


Nobody's Fool

by TakingFlight48



Series: Moments of Written Musings [20]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: 31 Days of Writing - Fall 2020, Astoria Greengrass/Gregory Goyle infidelity, Breakup, Cheating Astoria, Dramione hints, Dramione off-screen end game, F/M, Gregory Goyle slept with Astoria, Hermione Granger is a Good Friend, Inspired by a 9gag video, NO ONE CHEATS ON DRACO, No infidelity on Draco's part, October 20 Prompt: The Break-Up, Original 9gag video is in Spanish, Seemed to be a true story - and boy was it a story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-09 02:20:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27447022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TakingFlight48/pseuds/TakingFlight48
Summary: Draco Malfoy was nobody's fool.  And when his wife demanded to have the public muggle tradition of a baby shower for her firstborn child, he was quick to ensure all was ready to terminate their marriage so she could enjoy her future with a son he had confirmed was not his.
Relationships: Astoria Greengrass/Draco Malfoy
Series: Moments of Written Musings [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1946668
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27
Collections: 31 Days of Writing Challenge - Fall 2020





	Nobody's Fool

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 31 Days of Writing Challenge - October 20th Prompt: The Break-Up
> 
> This was inspired by a viral video my dear friend JessiRomantic [check out her fics she's got some amazing rare pairs] sent my way a few days ago. 
> 
> Thanks to the effervescent Kiwi05622 for her brilliant moodboard which really captured what I wanted without me speaking a word!! 
> 
> Enjoy ☮ ✌

* * *

“Draco?” 

“Yes, Treasure,” he hummed, placing the Prophet to the side and sending a silent heating charm to his tepid tea as he gave his wife his full attention. 

“I overheard the baby shower Pansy is throwing for her and Potter’s son. Do you think, well, that is to say, I want to have one to rival their child. Our son is due before their own, after all.” Astoria’s gaze was firmly on her plate as she meticulously cut the steak she had requested for breakfast. 

“That’s the event Hermione has been running around preparing, yes? The invitation you almost burned? Why would you want to do something you abhor?” Draco observed her as her jaw clenched before she silently placed her utensils on either side of the plate, dabbed her perfectly clean lips with her napkin and finally looked up at him. 

“Our son,” she placed a pale, delicate hand against her slightly distended abdomen, “deserves the celebration. If this is the path that those of our age group are weaving, I would rather not be left behind.”

“Of course, darling. A Malfoy never gets left behind, especially our firstborn,” his tongue felt heavy as he spoke, the fruit he attempted to chew, turning to ash. 

“Do you think you could coordinate with Narcissa and Granger to plan it? I have much too much on my plate presently to ensure it goes well. And since she seems to have taken the mantle of event planner for the Potters, I am certain she needs the funds.” 

Draco almost choked on his tea as he fought back the raised brow he knew would only start a larger row than he had the energy for this morning. “Any specific guests you’d like in attendance, then?” 

“I suppose the usual and then some. My parents, of course, should sit with us, wherever she places us, as well as ensure it’s set to occur before the Potter’s please.” With that, she stood, dropped her napkin over her plate, and glided out of the dining the room with a chilled kiss to his cheek. 

“Right,” he announced to the empty room, “How many galleons should I bet that I get kicked out of Granger’s office when I ask her to plan this?”

* * *

“Gr-Hermione, you have really outdone yourself. Are you sure law is where you excel?” Astoria asked as she gushed over Hermione, placing exaggerated kisses on either cheek before stepping back. 

“I’d like to think the 22 overturned laws and a 99% success rate in my prosecution trials demonstrate that. But thank you,” Hermione questioned more than asked as she shot a glare in Draco's direction. It had been a long few months of planning this farce of an event. And the part that had convinced Hermione to work with his _very specific_ wife had Hermione working laboriously with his Private Investigator to give Astoria the real surprise that today was crafted for. 

Astoria looked confused at Hermione’s remark and made a general comment about the decor before going off to greet all the people he would prefer to keep away from his son for at least 30 years. 

“Are you sur-” He nodded sharply once, cutting her off. 

"She was still you're wife at one point, Draco," she placed an inconspicuous hand on his forearm, a hold he cherished for the short moment she squeezed before immediately retreating. 

“In my shoes, knowing what you know now, I think you would do the same. This is long overdue, and plus, it’s been a while since I can make a splash this big.” 

She cringed at his wide smile, “I sometimes forget just how dramatic you can be, Draco. Just,” she stepped closer to him again, even with her heels she was still barley at chin height, “You’d tell me if you weren’t okay, right?” 

Draco just stared at her for a long while, swallowing back his desire to push her into a dark alcove and show her just how much he appreciated her place in his life. But that needed to wait; he was not in a place yet where she could receive everything she deserved from him. 

Smirking at the light blush caressing her cheeks she stepped back, lips pursed. “I would tell you. Right,” his eyes finally left her amber stained gaze, scanning the settling attendees, eyes landing on his wife and the exaggerated way she flashed the heirloom wedding ring over the child resting within her womb. 

She searched his face and must have found what she was looking for when her shoulders relaxed, “No kids so no worries about language. However, I suppose that wouldn’t have stopped you. Padma is here too, ready to cover it as you requested for the Prophet and to get her transcript over to Luna.”

“Yeah, okay. You’re going to have to explain how two witches got pregnant, but later, much later.” 

“I'd have to first explain Muggle advancements to you. Okay! Everyone’s seated, ready?” she chuckled, likely at how he couldn’t understand how Patil and Lovegood, both women, were expecting their first child. 

“Been ready,” he murmured as they approached the table, Hermione sitting to his right at the long family table, smirking at the confused look Astoria shot her way. 

Muttering a modified ‘Sonorous’ Draco began his prepared speech, “Thank you to all our friends, family, acquaintances, press, for taking time out of their day to join us on this new trend of celebrating our wives in pregnancy and our children before their birth. Before we begin, and in hopes that I can get the excitement out of the way and we may enjoy the rest of the day eating, drinking, and sharing gifts and anecdotes I have my solicitor and friend, Ms Hermione Granger here, with a gift for my beautiful wife.”

Astoria straightened in her seat, eyes bright and smile large as she shifted her gaze expectantly between himself and Hermione. Taking the proffered scroll, Draco flourished it and cleared his throat dramatically, letting his gaze land first on his wife, then his parents, her parents, the guests around them and finally his oldest friend. 

“This document was curated with the newest implementation of both magical and muggle science --something you'll have to ask Hermione about -- to determine a few key details about the child Astoria is carrying. First, our son previously believed to be five months along is actually seven.”

With a sharp gasp from the table next to theirs forced his eyes to collide with his oldest female friend, Pansy's hand gripping that of her husbands hard, the other coming up to cover her mouth, slowly piecing together what he had worked so hard to determine, to prove today. 

With a wink at Pansy, he dragged his hard silver eyes back to his wife. “Darling, how interesting that we have been married for only five months and per Malfoy tradition, our first night was our wedding night.”

“Darling, darling, why don’t we discuss this inside,” she was slowly getting up, attempting to shake her father's firm grip off her arm. 

“Oh, I am not quite finished, treasure. You see, I was confused and not altogether convinced that this document was correct. After all, why would you lie to me? So, of course, I had you followed.” He caught Goyle slowly backing his seat up, the rich wood of the chair legs scraping obscenely against the centuries-old hardwood of his drawing-room. He chuckled at Hermione’s ingenuity, sitting him in the corner of the room, no clear exit in place, and everyone knew the wards around his home disallowed disapparition from within. 

“Of course, we all know Ms Granger here is not a Private Investigator. However, for her to confirm the disillusionment of this marriage and deny my wife,” he sneered the word, “any rights to my properties, companies, vaults, and name, I needed proof. Proof that this son Astoria is expecting is not going to be a Malfoy.”

“Draco, Draco, please let me explain. You do not understand, it was once, one time. It meant nothing; it was just--” She was pleading now, tears tracking spotted black down her porcelain cheeks as she tugged on his sleeve like a mangy mutt while her father demanded a private explanation from either of them. 

He flourished his wand, robes billowing around his legs in a move he was certain his godfather would have been proud of, as he cast a ‘Revelio’ to the wall behind his wife. She shouted ‘No’, but it was too late as the previous grey dripped away to demonstrate his wife in various stages of undress and redress with Gregory Goyle. The photos looped over and over, her indiscretion, and lies available for all present to see as she sobbed next to him. 

He stood back as Pansy stormed over to Greg and landed a blow so fast he fell hard onto the ground. If Potter hadn’t held her back, reminding her of her own pregnancy, he was certain she would have slammed her heeled foot into his prone form. 

Draco's gut clenched with a renewed sense of sadness as Pansy first gripped his arm hard in support before gliding over to Hermione and holding her's in solidarity. But Hermione was stoic, standing regally in her blush gown, eyes swirling in vindication as the once proper crowd threw insults at her ex. The same man she had been dating, been in love with, when Astoria fell pregnant with his child. She claimed to be over him, but cheating hurt no matter how long ago it had happened or how ill-suited two people were for the other. 

He probably would have forgiven Greg, forgiven that he was sleeping with a woman he was marrying out of misplaced tradition if he hadn't done it while also sleeping with Hermione Granger. 

He turned cold eyes to his ex-wife, slowly detaching her clawed hold on his arm, idly running his fingers over the knuckles of her left hand. “Your bags are packed.” He held her hand tightly in his when she went to pull away, surprised she had expected anything else from him at this moment. 

“I have taken the liberty of donating all clothing purchased with my vaults to Luna’s charity, Threads for Babes, so at least some good will come out of your selfish behaviour. Patil has informed me that they have already clothed all the new children with the material from your wardrobe. Everything you came here with, as I stated, is waiting for you at the entrance hall.”

“Please, please, Draco, don’t you need my signature. I won’t give it. I won’t let you end this. What we have is beautiful. I will forgive this whole thing. It was one stupid mistake. I let him push me into that encounter. I didn’t want it but it was too late, Draco you have to believe me. Please, please, I love you, you.”

“Funny--” Hermione quipped to his right “--these photos seem to be in different places and at different times of day. Must have been one hell of a mistake.”

“Go choke on your library, Granger,” she spat, eyes widening as she glanced back at her former husband. “Did she poison you to me? That’s what this all is, Dragon! Think about it, love! This cunt is just jealous, jealous that her boyfriend of two years wanted a proper woman. Couldn’t please him well enough and concocted this madness after they broke up.”

“I need--” he began slowly, before cutting himself off as she shook his hands, eyes brightening at his perceived understanding. “The only thing I need is this.” He plucked his heirloom off her ring finger, dropping her hand as if burned while she keened loudly, attempting to match his backwards steps. 

“Right, the moment you pass through the front door, the wards will no longer recognize you. Good luck, Astoria. I truly wish you the best. Even if that means enjoying a happier, more satisfying life with my oldest friend.” Snapping his fingers Glipy appeared at his side, “Please ensure Ms. Greengrass finds her way to the entrance without delay. Wouldn’t want to get lost in our many halls after all.”

“You wretched bitch! Your cold, unfeeling cunt couldn't keep one man so you needed to take mine!” Astoria screamed at Hermione, as she stood stoically to Draco’s left, arms wrapped tightly around her middle, no indication if any of Astoria’s insults hit the mark. “Watch your back, Hermione Granger. I curse the day I brought you into this group of friends. You will rue the day you-”

“Astoria. Enough!" Lord Greengrass barked before gripping her daughter's upper arm and dragging her behind his house-elf. 

They watched her leave the party and the crowd shifted as Gregory stumbled out after her, cake and goo dripping off of him. A loud yelp rang out when Hermione shot a wordless Bat-Bogey Hex just as he reached the entrance to the hall. 

Nodding when he felt the wards confirm the exodus of his former wife and friend he turned to Hermione and the guests at large, clapping once, “Any other announcements I can prepare for today?”

“That one was quite enough for all of us mate,” Ron Weasley grunted from the far side of the room, eyes still wide as he slowly nursed a plate of finger foods.

Draco's smile was forced as he nodded once at the ginger-haired man before turning a softer smile to his mother and than Pansy as they looked back at him with concern. "I'd say congratulations are in order." Draco took a tumbler from his father, sending a silent nod in thanks before looking at Hermione, surrounded by his family and their collective friends. "And now, once this is firmly behind us all, I can look to my future."

Her blush, deeper and darker than her gown, brought a smile to his face as he lifted his glass in a toast of relief, enjoying the impromptu festivities for the rest of the event. 

**Author's Note:**

> This video made it's way in front of me at a time when I thought I couldn't do a break-up story justice. However, the hilarity and also bittersweetness to this man proving non-paternity and cheating at the baby shower just had to be replicated. And I am a wimp, unable to break up Dramione so instead, I give you the Drastoria break-up BEFORE the Dramione romance. :) 
> 
> Thanks to Grammarly for her robotic support and my beta - myself - is to blame for any errors still lingering here. 
> 
> Please leave love in words or kudos as they motivate and uplift.
> 
> ॐ


End file.
